Irony and Self-Deprecation

I'm watching Reptile Boy right now, and you know what I kind of blocked? That scene where Angel pulled Buffy to his chest for no reason, and then they whined over the fact that they can never be together! OH THE EPIC SOAP OPERA LOVE THAT COULD NEVER BE! ALAS! I was trying to give the pairing a chance since my Spike/Buffy fervor has been reduced over the years, but I don't see how I could take those two seriously. It's like a whiny and incredibly boring high school romance.

That's why I prefer Buffy/Spike/Angel because Spike wouldn't let those two get away with their whining, he'd just mock them and then get them into bed. Good times!

Timelord vs Vampire! Who would win?!

Now obviously this depends on the overall skill of the Time Lord and the vampire, so let us get into specifics:

Simm!Master vs, The Master(I'm watching BtVS season 1 at the moment): So, the vampire at full strength is pretty strong and pretty scary, he would probably win for awhile. He could probably pummel the hell out of Simm!Master. But there are a few things that could either work for or against Simm!Master. If he gets bit, his blood could either make the vampire a) super strong or b) sick. Also, Simm!Master can just regenerate, but if he just keeps on regenerating he could be a continuous food supply. But, he is the Master and is incredibly clever and evil, if he had his laser screwdriver, all bets are off and the Vampire!Master is going to get dusted (edit: except for the bones) or tortured for fucking with Simm!Master.

Angelus vs. Ten: Again, Angelus would probably win for a bit, probably for a lot a bit. Ten wouldn't want to fight anyway, and he wouldn't believe that Angelus was a vampire. He would tell Angelus he wasn't a vampire, just an alien, and that would piss Angelus off. When Ten realized that Angelus was a threat, he would try to run or get out his sonic screwdriver. Angelus would stop him, knock the sonic screwdriver out of his hands, and knock him unconscious. Angelus would torture him, and not think that Ten was a threat at all. If Time Lord blood makes Angelus sick, he probably wouldn't let Ten go either, he'd just keep on torturing him for fun. His arrogance would get in the way, like it always does, and Ten would escape, get his sonic screwdriver back, and over power Angelus. When Ten has Angelus, he would give him an ultimatum, but Ten would have to talk very very fast because Angelus is psychotic, strong, and clever, so the ultimatum would have to be issued quickly and when Angelus doesn't take it, Ten would have to kill him quickly so Angelus doesn't kill him.

Spike (pre-chip pre-soul) vs. Five : I'm using Five because he didn't really use a sonic screwdriver, and the use of a tool is how the Master and the Doctor won their fights. Also, Spike would never be stupid enough to fight a Timelord if he knew what they could do, but if Five walked up to him? Spike would think he just came across an easy meal. Five would probably have to do some good fighting or be very very clever and get away before Spike can kill him. Since Five is so clever, he could probably figure out a way to distract Spike or just get the fudge out fast. Again, the blood issue is introduced. If his blood had any effect on Spike and made him sick, he could get away. Or if Spike did drain him, he would just regenerate after Spike left him. But I have more faith in Five, he could get out of that situation. Hand to hand combat though? Eh, not so much. If Five had a good cricket bat though? I think he might eventually swing at Spike's head.

If Spike had his chip, he wouldn't start a fight, but if he did realize he could hurt any Time Lord, he would pummel the hell out them. After the Time Lord got his/her bearings though, they could probably get out of there, or if they're super strong, kick his ass. I really should have wrote this whole post under the assumption that Time Lords are super strong. Shit. Well, if they are all in fact super strong, they'd win no matter what. Which makes this post kind of moot.

Haley and I have started writing and plotting a DW/BtVS/AtS crossover fic set at the end of season 4 of Buffy and in an AU in which the Master didn't die at the end of Last of The Time Lords. (Edit: Dammit Lindy, 'Time Lords' is two words! Two!) Pairings will include Doctor/Master and Angel/Wesley. And apparently Haley is over her Riley hating so it's just going to be Buffy/Riley and no Spike/Buffy, which really, I'm cool with. But, The Master and Spike will be plotting together. So basically, it's going to a be a Doctor/Master fic (which I will be writing and I am so scared of getting into their fucked up minds) and it's going to be an AU ending of Season 4 of Buffy. I've already written the first bit when The Doctor and The Master land in Sunnydale. It is going to be awesome!

For research we're going to watch Doomed, The Yoko Factor, a few episodes of Angel and The Sound of Drums and/or Last of the Time Lords.

We're watching Doomed right now and HOLY SHIT SPIKE WAS SO PRETTY! With the slow blink and the head tilt and the funny hawaiin t-shirt. I love him so much!

I just cleaned the bathroom and showered and now I feel a little less shitty. Woo!

I'm having a lot of fun with Gay!Cardboard!Angel. I went to bed after Haley and Jaime and I put Gay!Cardboard!Angel in front of their door. Evidently Haley was quite frightened when she got up to pee. xD When I'm not scaring Haley with it I'm getting scared by it. Whenever I see him in the corner of my eye I think some dude is just standing in our living room or in our kitchen (he moves around a bit). We need to put him in a corner like Cardboard!Spike. Cardboard!Spike only scares me sometimes, not fucking constantly. Last night Haley and I were talking about it and we think we're going to start moving both of them around. Like they could be plotting in the corner, or in separate corners ignoring each other, or they could be arguing about Cowboys and Astronauts... or we're actually crazy. That's a possibility too.

Well I set a personal goal for myself today and tomorrow. I'm going to watch all of Life On Mars. I've seen some of season 1 and some of season 2 and I just need to see all of it. I am also going to make alouette_sparra an Evans icon or two. :) So, I'm off!